From Podpedia

Tommyball, also known as Talking Tommyball, is a podcast idea created by Brady about two sports commentators narrating a fictional sport called "Tommyball". The podcast would assume that listeners know about the rules of the fictional sport of Tommyball already, therefore keeping the rules of Tommyball always somewhat of a mystery.

Ideas (from The Unmade Podcast #4: An Awkward Hot Chocolate)[edit | edit source]

Some ideas for Tommyball facts were discussed, including:

  • There was a TV ban in 1978. No images are allowed to be broadcasted.
  • There is a controversial player called Fred Dickinson.
  • It is a two-team competitive game. Some teams include: Dragon legends and Warriors.
  • The game was used to be played bare foot.
  • There are vehicles included.
  • The game is better played when it is raining. New Tommyball stadiums include sprinklers.
  • Cliche phrases as: "You cannot double duck a worldwar super jumper".
  • The game includes an oval shaped red ball.
  • It was played in 1953.

Ideas (from The Unmade Podcast Special: Tommyball)[edit | edit source]

  • the game uses Do-wecky-points
  • games end with a whistle
  • The game uses Stemball balls
  • 19 umpires review decisions
  • sketches are used to review decisions afterwards [A Tommyball proverb sounds: "the game is not over until the sketches are done"]
  • Every team starts the season with 4 points of some kind
  • You have to be 18 to spectate a game
  • If you as a parent sneak in a minor you get arrested
  • 19 hours is considered a short game
  • Every season a player is inducted into the Hall of Fame, a gala is held in their honour at the Ackaba Hotel
  • There is a statue of limitations of getting added to the HoF (21 years after the Tommyballers retirement)
  • The TommyBall League has footage of the games which it can withhold from release indefinitely
  • Chickens are used for wheater forecast and their behaviour while on the field pecking it, is used to try to predict the game
  • There are only 8 chicken used in the preparation of the field, their picking is an important part of conditioning the field before the game
  • A clear sky is considered bad for the game, high air moisture makes grabbing the Tommyball easier
  • The game uses a Tommyball
  • The field has parts made out of grass and concrete
  • A season last 3 years
  • Spectators are advised to have an updated Will
  • Weapons during play are controversial and banned for this year of play but acceptable during the half-time break
  • Spectators can run on the field as they please
  • Spectators are allowed to carry weapons on the field as well
  • Nineteen push-shovel are now worth a goal
  • A tommyball supercomputer is used to calculate the final result using official algorithms to calculate the final winning margin.
  • Shoes weren't allowed 20 years ago, players where wearing potato sacks on the feet
  • The field is the shape of either a rhombus or an octagon, this season the Tommyball League is using a rhombus-shaped field
  • Junior Tommyball is played on a parallelogram.
  • At the 500 min mark of the first game of the season, it is tradition to stop gameplay and listen 30 minutes to an audiobook before modern technology this would be done by the stadium announcer reading a book to the spectators over the communication system.
  • During the audiobook brake, the players stand silently on the field
  • The first game of the season has around 150 thousand spectators
  • Being quick and fit is considered a disadvantage for a team (probably the subcutaneous fat is seen as a good natural armour against wounds)
  • Score differences of 1000nd goals are considered a marginal difference
  • Shortest opening game of the season was 7days 3h 19 minutes, although super cups games are generally considered quicker games
  • Less then 1000 goals is considered a very low score
  • This season player uniforms changed, they now include hats, previously players wore hairnets, the capes are now longer too
  • There are new rules regarding cape use, including a "deliberate suffocation rule", which are supposed to make less player suffocate,
  • 1-2 suffocation per game is considered acceptable
  • The double ninja chucker is the starting place of the game, there is also a box somewhere on or around the field where players spend time
  • The Tommyball logo has been unchanged for 390 years