H.I. No. 3: Four Light Bulbs: Difference between revisions

Grey: And thatsthat's why its also sort of uncomfortable to watch is because like I’m seeing the person on- on- on- th- on the film talking about “How"How midi-chlorians just change the whole nature of the Star Wars universe”universe" and their really Ernest you know but it’s- it is cut to be a funny movie so thatsthat's why I would say It’s- It’s really uncomfortable to watch but also- also enjoyable.

Brady: But I don’t- I always think that those people that are really passionate about the film and talk about midi-chlorians and all that, I kindakind of think, I dunnodon't know, Maybe I saw myself and didn’t mind it so much-

Grey:  Yeah I- I Definitely, I enjoyed it and I’m- I’m glad for the recommendations but I- I would say that it was, uhh…uh... It was similar to the uh... the Trekkies documentary, Is- It’s the same kind of think but for Star Trek.

Grey: [Sigh] So, to- uh, today, the thing- the thing that I kindakind of wanted to talk about and this might be very scatter brained, so, we’ll- we'll see how it goes. But the thing that I wanted to talk about, is something that has been, sort of loosely on my mind for the past... two and a half, maybe three years, and it is the notion of "work-life balance" um--

Grey: Okay, so I- I think very often when people are talking about work-life balance, there kindakind of talking about, you know, "having it all" right you have this- this great personal life that is fulfilling with family and friends and activities and hobbies, and you are also a person who is excelling in your job, right, you're doing great at work, and I think that people like to talk about work-life balance and trying to achieve work-life balance, because that it- is an amazing ideal, it's like the platonic ideal of what you want your life to be. But I think that that scuttles to the side difficult decisions that have to be made about how your going to spend your time and your energy.

Grey: Um, so that- that is the kind of basis of- of the augment I kindakind of want to make today.

Brady 21:18 That's extraordinary.

Grey 23:04 [chuckles]

No. I completely agree. It's one of the areas where I think that analogy with light bulbs doesn't pan out perfectly. Because I can't I can't remember where I first heard this analogy, but talking about interpersonal relationships as kind of like bank accounts in the sense that, you know, if you spend time with someone, you're kind of investing into this friendship bank account. And there may be times when you're not available, or you're not being a good friend, and you can kind of draw to some extent on those previous investments. But at some point, the bank account runs out. Right and then it is redeemable at that point, right. You reached like friendship bankruptcy. Yeah. And so I I am totally with you on this. I agree. And I think that part of making hard decisions in life is coming to grips with areas in your life, which you're sort of willing to possibly have damage happen. That's why when I was focusing mainly on YouTube, you know, I'm going to probably through the course of this conversation have a bunch of numbers that don't add up to 100%one hundred percent. But But let's, let's just say that basically, like 80%eighty percent of my effort was on work and sort of 20%twenty percent was on family. Because, right, I am very happy with my marriage and not willing to risk long term damage to the marriage. Yeah, right. And so that light bulb can't be zero, because that like that is consequences that I'm not willing to accept, right, but in a in a period where I have a lot of a lot of things that need to get done and a limited amount of time and energy to do them. If I'm not willing to make any sacrifices on the family side of things. And I need to have an enormous amount of energy into the work side of things. Something has to get cut. And that's that's where I sort of find this this analogy is is useful. And and

I think yeah, it is very hard to be exceptional. If If you are dedicating equal energy across the board, but I also think that that's, that is perfectly reasonable to do. It's, you know, it, it's just a very, I think people should just be aware of the decision. That they're making, right. And so if you if whatever the field of work that you're in, if you want to try to be incredibly successful at that field, you're going to have to make in the beginning, difficult decisions about what other parts of your life or you're going to cut. And I get, I don't know if it's if it's frustrated, but when people talk about, you know, wanting to do something, but not not recognizing or not being willing to give up other areas of their life. That's, that's sort of frustrating for me to observe. And I think that that thinking about those areas very consciously is is helpful, right? If if you're not willing to make the sacrifices, then I think you should also not feel guilty about not doing whatever it is you want to do, right becoming an Olympic skier. Don't feel guilty that you're not working on your Olympic skiing, if you've made like a 25%twenty-five percent across the board decision for how to allocate your energy No pain, no gain. Yeah, I guess so. But I like this decision matrix like, No pain, no gain is is is vague, right? Like No, no, this