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H.I. No. 3: Four Light Bulbs: Difference between revisions

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H.I. No. 3: Four Light Bulbs (edit)

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Brady: Right.
 
Grey: I agree, and, uh, I think that part of making hard decisions in life is coming to grips with areas in your life, which you're sort of willing to possibly have damage happen. And that's why when, um, I was focusing mainly on YouTube, uh, you know, I'm going to probably through the course of this conversation have a bunch of numbers that don't add up to one -hundred percent.
 
Brady: [chuckles]
Line 612:
Grey: And I think that that is totally fine, right? I do not begrudge anyone who says "right, twenty-five across the board". I think that is a totally reasonable decision.
 
Brady: But you think it leads to mediocrity.
 
Grey: I think, yeah, it is very hard to be exceptional, if- if you are dedicating equal energy across the board. But I also think that that's- that is perfectly reasonable to do.
 
Brady 30:38 Yeah.
 
that you think it leads to mediocrity?
Grey: Um, it's, you know, it- it's just a very- I think people should just be aware of the decisions that they're making, right? And so if you- if whatever the field of work that you're in, if you want to try to be incredibly successful at that field, you're going to have to make, in the beginning, difficult decisions about "what other parts of your life are you going to cut?".
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: And I- and I- I get, I don't know if it'- it's- if it's frustrated, but, when people talk about, you know, wanting to- to do something, but not- not recognizing or not being willing to give up other areas of their life, that's- that's sort of frustrating for me to observe, and I- and I think that- that thinking about those areas very consciously is- is helpful, right?
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: If- if you're not willing to make the sacrifices, then I think you should also not feel guilty about not doing whatever it is you want to do, right? Becoming an Olympic skier. Don't feel guilty that you're not working on your Olympic skiing, if you've made like a "twenty-five percent across the board" decision for how to allocate your energy.
 
Brady: No pain, no gain.
 
Grey: Yeah, I guess so. Um, but I- I like this decision matrix, of like- "no pain, no gain" is- is- is vague, right? Like no-no-no,--
 
Brady: Whereas decision matrix is really specific and easy to understand.
 
Grey: [laughing] Yeah, right, or like, let's- here: Here's a board. Here's some dials. If you want to turn up any of the one dials, all the other dials turn down, right? Now let's decide where you're going to go with that. Um, and- and again, it just- it has been on my mind this month in particular, because I do- I do feel like I have finally gotten to the stage where I can turn down my business dial a little, because I need to turn the health dial back up, right? And- and I had been very aware of that this month where, excuse me, I've sort of changed my diet to try to be healthier and I've taken out more time to exercise,--
 
Brady: Oh, have you joined a gym?
 
Grey: I have- well, actually I have- I have uh, yes, I have joined a gym, is the short answer.
 
Brady: Is this the first time you've ever joined a gym?
 
Grey: No, it is not the first time I've ever joined a gym because, I used to join a gym and then feel badly about not going,--
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: --and, prior- very, very prior to my YouTube career, I used to have a more across the- the board setting of my priorities,--
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: --and I used to, like, cycle around London all the time, and- and I used to have, you know, engaging hobbies and like all of that just went away, um, you know, as- as YouTube took up more and more time. So,--
 
Brady: When you would like that, when you were more across the board, were you happy?
 
Grey: [sighs] Okay, that's a difficult question to answer, because the- the straight up answer is "yes". Um, but I can also say that I was always trying to do additional work on the side, right? Which might be something that we talk about more in detail in the future, but--
 
Brady: Mm.
 
Grey: --I had like a number of little side businesses that I was trying, all through my professional life. And, you know, I was- I was dedicating to them, perhaps an insufficient amount of time to make them successful. And they--
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: --and they weren't. And that's because I was busy going around London, right? On my photography hobby, right? Taking pictures of all kinds of stuff. Um, like, if you look me up on Flickr, like, you can see a record of all of these pictures that I took,--
 
Brady: Hmm.
 
Grey: --and then you can see that it just abruptly stops, right? And that's- and that's partly because, like, I just have not had time or energy for photography hobby, so--
 
Brady: Now that you've tweaked the dials,--
 
Grey: Yeah.
 
Brady: --and you've, you know, for this past couple of years you've been YouTube machine, are you happier?
 
Grey: Yeah, I would say that I am. I- I would say without a doubt I would rather be where I am now, and having to kind of claw back some of the damage that was caused from ignoring my health for a while, than be where I was before, with a more even balance across the board.
 
Brady: You are a man of science, though,--
 
Grey: [chuckles]
 
Brady: --and a man of logic. Surely you don't think it is a good way to live, to neglect your body for two years and then fix your body up and neglect something for- surely you must see that that's not the ideal way to operate.
 
Grey: I- I think- see the problem there is- is with your- your word ideal.
 
Brady: Right.
 
Grey: And- and I, like, I totally agree, I would rather have the level of fitness that I had five years ago,--
 
Brady: Hmm.
 
Grey: --um, than the level of fitness that I have now, but I- I am realistic, and I think that I would not be where I am today if I had not made decisions about sacrificing time, particularly in- in the health, you know, and also in the friends category, right?
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: But ideally, I would not want to do that. Like, I- I sit here today and I can say that I am like genuinely sad that some friends that I used to be in touch with more, that I'm not in touch with now. And that's a very hard thing to ever fix. But--
 
Brady: I guess the ideal test for the thesis you've- you're putting to us today, is to look at the most successful people in the world and say "are they fat, divorced and have no friends?"
 
Grey: [chuckles] That is an excellent question.
 
Brady: Because I'm the- because I'm the same as you,--
 
Grey: Mm-hmm.
 
Brady: --and because I have, you know, neglected my health and relationships because of my, uh, obsession with work,--
 
Grey: Mm-hmm.
 
Brady: --I kind of justify it the same way you do and I say "well, any success I've had is because of it". And, I don't know, if- if you spent two hours a day less thinking about work or switched off your computer a bit earlier and went out with your mates and went for a run, would you not be as successful? Really?
 
Grey: This gets into some complicated things about "the nature of work",--
 
Brady: Hmm.
 
Grey: --and, the kind of- of work that I think we do and that- that many people who are self employed do, it necessitates that that particular light bulb is turned up higher than it would normally be.
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: And so, um--
 
Brady: I agree with that. I agree with that.
 
Grey: --for- you know, for example, I have- I've spoken with a number of- of friends who are not self employed, and the general consensus of what everybody loves about their job is that when the workday is over, they don't care anymore.
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: It doesn't matter. They don't have to think about it anymore, because they'll go in tomorrow, and the work will be there and they- and they are paid to work a particular period of time, and then, day's over, and it doesn't matter anymore. And that's a huge psychological relief that you give up, if there is theoretically always something more that you can be doing.
 
Brady: And the other thing those people forget, is, like, I have a lot of friends that work in television and tell me how stressful their day is, but if the camera breaks, that's someone else's job to fix,--
 
Grey: Right.
 
Brady: --and if the lights go out, and if their computer stops working, that's the IT department, and someone else does this and- but when you work on your own, everything is your problem.
 
Grey: Yeah.
 
Brady: And those problems never go away.
 
Grey: Yeah. This is again, first world YouTuber problems, right? That--
 
Brady: Yeah, of course.
 
Grey: --that we are one people businesses. But my- my point is that, you know, I don't know exactly where this number is, but I- I think if you are a one person business of any kind, in order to keep that running, I don't think, you know, just to pick a number that the work light bulb can ever be below fifty watts, right? It can't be below sort of half your energy, no matter what you do, because everything is your responsibility, you know, in a one person business. Um,--
 
Brady: The one thing I want to come back to, though, with this analogy, and I know I--
 
Grey: Yeah.
 
Brady: --brought it up at the start and then you pulled a Grandi's series on me and kind of baffled me a bit,--
 
Grey: [chuckles]
 
Brady: --but the thing I think is the debate to be had, for people like us, is: Can- do we switch the bulb off? Do we switch the work bulb off at 7pm or 8pm and switch the wife, you know, your wife bulb on, or your friend bulb on, at- and- can you ever turn that work bulb off? Because that's the thing that's put to me all the time by my, you know, the critics in my life. It's not that I work too much. In fact, it's said to me "work more hours if you want, wake up earlier, work later,"--
 
Grey: Mm-hmm.
 
Brady: --"I don't mind,"--
 
Grey: Mm-hmm.
 
Brady: --"but have a stop time." And partly that's for maintenance of your relationships and your friendships and your health,--
 
Grey: Mm-hmm.
 
Brady: --but the argument that's put to me, again, I'm making other people's arguments here--
 
Grey: Yeah, yeah.
 
Brady: --is that, doing that is good for your work as well, it gives you kind of a refresh and it's healthy to stop thinking about work for a while. And, when you're talking about these light bulbs, you know, I'm- I'm sort of imagining even when you're at the movies with- with Mrs. CGP Grey,--
 
Grey: [chuckles]
 
Brady: --or out with mates at the pub, that your work bulb is still dimly on at, you know, ten watts. And the thing I think that may be healthy is switch that bulb off altogether, if you can.
 
Grey: Yeah, well, I- I- I think the thing that I'm about to say you will sympathize with,--
 
Brady: Mm.
 
Grey: --which is that I do not really have the ability to do that at this stage.
 
Brady: Yeah.
 
Grey: Right? Like I- I am not quite able to do that. I- I'm going to guess I'm going to make a guess about your personality here, but I'm going to guess that you are not a person who plays video games.
 
Brady: I am not, no.
 
Grey: Okay. Uh,--
 
Brady: I used to be many years ago, but I just can't get into them anymore, that's true.
 
Grey: Yeah. So I am still the person who plays video games.
 
Brady: Mm, okay.
 
Grey: And, I am a- I am very much aware that one of the reasons why I do still like to play video games is that it's one of the very few activities where I can say that I'm genuinely not thinking about work.
 
Brady: Mm.
 
Grey: I will play, and it is totally absorbing, and I- I feel like I don't have, uh, any kind of work thoughts going on in the background and that's--
 
Brady: Hmm.
 
Grey: --that is enjoyable, and it's one of the reasons why, um, I know I've mentioned this on Reddit and a few places, but, almost always, the day or two after I release a video, which is always a huge push, at the very end to get that done, I basically take two days and it's like, "I'm not doing anything. I'm just going to sit here on this computer and just play a game, you know, for the next day or two", like, "this is- this is my weekend now, and I- I have to, like, reset my brain".
Grey 30:41
I think yeah, it is very hard to be exceptional. If If you are dedicating equal energy across the board, but I also think that that's, that is perfectly reasonable to do. It's, you know, it, it's just a very, I think people should just be aware of the decision. That they're making, right. And so if you if whatever the field of work that you're in, if you want to try to be incredibly successful at that field, you're going to have to make in the beginning, difficult decisions about what other parts of your life or you're going to cut. And I get, I don't know if it's if it's frustrated, but when people talk about, you know, wanting to do something, but not not recognizing or not being willing to give up other areas of their life. That's, that's sort of frustrating for me to observe. And I think that that thinking about those areas very consciously is is helpful, right? If if you're not willing to make the sacrifices, then I think you should also not feel guilty about not doing whatever it is you want to do, right becoming an Olympic skier. Don't feel guilty that you're not working on your Olympic skiing, if you've made like a twenty-five percent across the board decision for how to allocate your energy No pain, no gain. Yeah, I guess so. But I like this decision matrix like, No pain, no gain is is is vague, right? Like No, no, this
 
Brady 32:09 Okay.
decision matrix is really specific and easy to understand.
 
Grey 32:13
Yeah, right or like, Look, here, here's a board. Here's some dials. If you want to turn up any of the one dials all the other dials turned down right now it's decide where you're going to go with that. And, and, again, it has been on my mind this month in particular, because I do I do feel like I have finally gotten to the stage where I can turn down my business dial a little because I need to turn the health dial back up. Right and and I had been very aware of that this month where, excuse me, I've sort of changed my diet to try to be healthier and I've taken out more time to exercise.
 
Brady 32:51
Have you joined a gym?
 
Grey 32:53
I have well actually I have I have Yes, I have joined a gym is the short answer. Is this the first time you've ever joined a gym? No, it is not the first time ever joined a gym because I used to join a gym and then feel badly about not going. Yeah. And prior very, very prior to my YouTube career, I used to have a more across the board setting of my priorities. And I used to like cycle around London all the time. And and I used to have, you know, engaging hobbies and like all of that just went away. You know, as as YouTube took up more and more time. So
 
Brady 33:25
when you would like that when you were more across the board. Were you happy?
 
Grey 33:32
Okay, that's a difficult question to answer because the the straight up answer is, yes. But I can also say that I was always trying to do additional work on the side, right, which might be something that we talk about more in detail in the future, but I had like a number of little side businesses that I was trying, all through my professional life. And, you know, I was I was dedicating to them, perhaps an insufficient amount of time to make them successful. Yeah. And they weren't. And that's because I was busy going around London right on my photography hobby, right taking pictures of all kinds of stuff. Like if you look me up on flicker like you can see a record of all of these pictures that I took, and then you can see that it just abruptly stops. And that's and that's partly because like I just have not had time or energy for photography hobby, so that you've tweaked the dials
 
Brady 34:32
you've you know, for this past couple of years you've been YouTube machine. You happier
 
Grey 34:39
Yeah, I would say that I am. I would say without a doubt I would rather be where I am now. And having to kind of claw back some of the damage that was caused from ignoring my health for a while. Then be where I was before, with a more even balance across the board.
 
Brady 34:58
You are a man of science. A man of logic, surely you don't think it is a good way to live to neglect your body for two years and then fix your body up and neglect something for surely you must see that that's not the ideal way to operate.
 
41:33
Grey 35:17
I think, see the problem there is with your your word ideal, right? And I like I totally agree, I would rather have the level of fitness that I had five years ago than the level of fitness that I have now. But I am realistic. And I think that I would not be where I am today if I had not made decisions about sacrificing time, particularly in the health you know, and also in the friends category, right. But ideally, I would not want to do that. Like I sit here today. And I can say that I am like genuinely sad that some friends that I used to be in touch with more that I'm not in touch with Now, and that's a very hard thing to ever fix. But
 
Brady 36:05
I guess the ideal test for the thesis you put into us today is to look at the most successful people in the world and say, are they fat, divorced and have no friends?
 
Grey 36:18
That is an excellent question.
 
Brady 36:20
Because I'm the because I'm the same as you. And because I have, you know, neglected my health and relationships because of my obsession with work. I kind of justify the same way you do. And I say, well, any success I've had is because of it. And I don't know, if if you spent two hours a day less thinking about work or switched off your computer a bit earlier and went out with your mates and went for a run. Would you not be a successful? Really,
 
Grey 36:56
this gets into some complicated things about the nature of work, and the kind of work that I think we do and that that many people who are self employed, do it necessitates that that particular light bulb is turned up higher than it would normally be. Yeah. And so I agree with that. I agree with that for you know, for example, I have, I've spoken with a number of friends who are not self employed. And the general consensus of what everybody loves about their job is that when the workday is over, they don't care anymore. Yeah, it doesn't matter. They don't have to think about it anymore. Because they'll go in tomorrow, and the work will be there and they and they are paid to work a particular period of time, and then days over, and it doesn't matter anymore. And that's a huge psychological relief that you give up. If there is theoretically always something more that you can be doing.
 
Brady 37:55
And the other thing those people forget, is like I have a lot of friends that work in television. And tell me how stressful their day is. But if the camera breaks, that's someone else's job to fix. And if the lights go out, and if their computer stops working, that's the IT department, and someone else does listen. But when you work on your own, everything is your problem. Yeah. And those problems never go away.
 
Grey 38:18
Yeah, this is again, first world youtuber problems, right? So we are one people businesses. But my, my point is that and I don't know exactly where this number is, but I think if you are a one person business of any kind, in order to keep that running, I don't think you know, just to pick a number that the work light bulb can ever be below 50 watts, right? It can't be below sort of half your energy, no matter what you do, because everything is your responsibility, you know, in a one person business.
 
Brady 38:50
The one thing I want to come back to though with this analogy, and I know you wanted up at the start and then you pulled a grandi series on me and kind of baffled me a bit. But the thing I think The debate to be had for people like us is can do we switch the bulb off? Do we switch the work bulb off at 7pm or 8pm and switch the wife you know your wife bulb on or your friend bulb on at and can you ever turn that work bulb off because that's the thing that's put to me all the time by my mother critics in my life. It's not that I work too much. In fact, it's said to me work more hours if you want wake up earlier work later. I don't mind but have a stop time. And partly that's for maintenance of your relationships and your friendships and your health. But the argument that's put to me again, I'm making other people's ideas here is that doing that is good for your work as well. It gives you kind of a refresh and it's healthy to stop thinking about work for a while. And when you're talking about these light bulbs, you know i'm i'm sort of imagining even when you're at the movies with with Mrs. CGP Grey or out with mates at the pub, that your work Bob is still dimly on it, you know, 10 watts. And the thing I think it may be healthy is switched that bulb off altogether. If you can
 
Grey 40:10
get well I think the thing that I'm about to say you will sympathize with, which is that I do not really have the ability to do that at this stage. Yeah, right. Like I I am not quite able to do that. I'm going to guess I'm going to make a guess about your personality here. But I'm going to guess that you are not a person who plays video games.
 
Brady 40:30
I am not No. Okay. I used to be many years ago, but I just can't get into them anymore. That's true.
 
, but I find that the no other activity would do that. Even if I preferred that it would, you know, if I took like a mini holiday with the missus, I would still be kind of thinking about, you know, what are all the comments that are coming in? Where did it get linked to? How is it being received? Oh, God, what's the next thing going to be the next thing right, which is always a huge concern. Yeah, of course. Now, the very irony of this, this whole situation is that the games that I play are all was all a variation of some kind of work simulator. I do not play, like first person shooter games, but I play a game that's in the sim category right? cgp group
Grey 40:35
Yeah. So I am still the person who plays video games. Okay. And I am a I am very much aware that one of the reasons why I do still like to play video games is that it's one of the very few activities where I can say that I'm genuinely not thinking about work. I will play and it is totally absorbing and I feel like I don't have any kind of work thoughts going on in the background and that that is enjoyable. And it's one of the reasons why. I know I've mentioned this on Reddit and a few places, but almost always the day or two after I release a video, which is always a huge push, at the very end to get that done. I basically take two days, it's like, I'm not doing anything. I'm just gonna sit here on this computer and just play a game, you know, for the next day or two, like this is, this is my weekend now. And I have to like, reset my brain. Okay, but I find that the no other activity would do that. Even if I preferred that it would, you know, if I took like a mini holiday with the missus, I would still be kind of thinking about, you know, what are all the comments that are coming in? Where did it get linked to? How is it being received? Oh, God, what's the next thing going to be the next thing right, which is always a huge concern. Yeah, of course. Now, the very irony of this, this whole situation is that the games that I play are all was all a variation of some kind of work simulator. I do not play, like first person shooter games, but I play a game that's in the sim category right? cgp group
 
Brady 42:13
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